Reading on Monday Aug 11 about the death of Robin Williams came as a surprise to me like it was to most people. The saddest thing is to know he died in a very dark place. He was such a talented man, and those of us who were around remember when he burst on the scene on Mork and Mindy. Though he lived a life with laughter, he also lived in a world where many fall as well. He had to deal with alcohol, and I am sure around those who used drugs as well.
It brings me back to my life where I have often dealt with depression as well. The so called experts call depression a disease, however, I call it a side effect and an affliction. Most people who deal with depression because of some type of sickness. I believe most of us have dealt with depression at some level or another.
For me depression had to do mostly with insecurity, and rejection. It is amazing still to this day how children can be so mean to each other. One of my early writings on this blog had to do with my experience with bullying, and my advice to those who deal with it today. Now it has become worse because of the internet where fellow classmates put on embarrassing things such as showing the child masturbating, or calling them gays. It is hard enough to live this life than putting things on the internet for all to see. When I was growing up especially during my early childhood I would cry myself to sleep. When I was four years old I almost died from being burned. So I would ask God why he didn’t take me when he had the chance.
Yes depression can be a lonely and a dark place to be. Many cannot handle it, and believe suicide is the only way out. I had a cousin Judy who died after committing suicide. She was bipolar an illness that usually leads to heavy and dark depression. Her mother, and my aunt died about a year before, and she could not handle the loss of her any longer. Also, I had a great Aunt who I never met who committed suicide as well because she was rejected, and went into depression as well.
I believe that we are in a spiritual world as well as a natural world where the enemy of our souls (many call Satan) wants to destroy and kill us. I believe the reason I am still alive is because of my faith in God and his grace. I know that there is a better place for us to go after we die. If you struggle with depression I would go to someone that you trust, and let them know that you dealing with depression. For me it is a daily journey that I know I must live with, however, in my weakness God is my strength.
My thoughts and prayers will be with you as well. It is important that we become stronger, and better people, but we need help sometimes. Our family and friends are with us too. Even during those dark times it is important to remember that we have a purpose and destiny that is beyond ourselves.