Our Memories

  I have written a lot of about times growing up that I remember a lot. Our lives are made of memories. In fact every day we make up new memories. What is funny or interesting depending on how you think about it we remember things from a long time ago more than what we did last week? I would say the chances I will remember some things from last week in a year from now then today.

There a lot of memories that I don’t really remember what specifically happen but the situations are really clear.  I remember certain events very clearly while others I don’t.  Most of the events I only remember certain things that happened during them and not the whole event.  I am sure a lot of us are that way; however, I am sure that there are others who could tell you everything that happened on that day. Some people just have better memories than others. I can give you an example is my high school graduation. I remember the date, where it happened, some things leading up to, during, and after the event. More I think about that day the more I remember what happened.  Right now I would say I recall about seventy-five percent of what happened that day and continue thinking about it the percentage goes up.

The thing about memories is that we all have good ones and bad ones. We all gone through things we never want to go through again. We have been hurt by people and hurt people ourselves.  We have experiences that we are ashamed of and feel bad about. What I choose to do is not dwell on those memories. In fact those who hurt me in the past I have forgiven them so I know that they happened but I no longer remember the events that they occurred. I believe it is a real blessing. I believe those who are bitter inside are those who have not forgiven those people who caused the bitterness. It is a lot harder to do so if the circumstances happened recently as well. Forgiveness is the true answer or we will never get past those circumstances. It is not always easy but it is something we must do if we want to have a healthy life from this day forward.

My mother who is ninety-four and coming up to ninety-five in September still has a very good memory. She still remembers things from her childhood as well as other events in her life. It is really good when she talks about growing up in the depression along with World War 2 that happened during her twenties. Also, she grew up in Canada so I get a whole different perspective than I would have from my father.

My mother though is the last member of my family from her generation. My father has been gone for twenty-two years along with aunts and uncles as well as their cousins. I find it somewhat funny when my mother talks about her cousins she always says cousin before there name. For example she had a cousin Roy and she always refers to him as Cousin Roy. I finally asked her recently after all these years she calls him Cousin Roy. The reason is that she was the youngest child in her immediate family so Cousin Roy was a lot older than her. Now it makes some sense. I may say initially referring  to my cousin Bronwen putting cousin first so they know I talking about a relative but when I continue in the conversation I just say Bronwen because they now know who she is in regards to me and our relationship but that is not the way with Cousin Roy. Anyway it still seems funny.

When it comes to my aunts and uncles there are only a few events I remember seeing them at. Some are clearer to me than others; however, I do remember their personalities and how they acted. They had their faults and were funny and peculiar in their own ways. I really remember the real funny events the most; however, they are family and I love them very much. Also, I remember how each of them talked. They were all unique in how they spoke, and they were all different from each other.

Going back a generation I really only new two of my grandparents. My Grandmother Nightingale died when I was thirteen months old so of course I don’t remember her at all. I only know what I have been told.  My Grandfather Shaw died when I was four so I don’t remember him either. The circumstances in my life during that period are why I don’t remember him. I received my middle name from Grandfather Shaw, and my mother tells how much I am like him.  Grandfather Nightingale died when I was nine. I don’t remember a lot about him except he gave me fig newton bars and cod liver oil which was awful. Also, I remember him smoking a pipe.  Grandmother Shaw died when I think I was thirteen years old. She was on our trip part of the time when we spent the summer traveling through Canada and eastern United States. She was a lot like my mother where was in very good health and still had her mind when she died of a stroke. If they had prescriptions then like they do now she would have lived a lot longer.

So remember memories are the best part of our lives, and make sure you go out make some really good new memories.