When we communicate it is important to use the right words otherwise others can get the wrong idea. Often when there is an argument it has to do with the words being used or the person you are speaking with isn’t clear what you said. They may have thought you said one thing while you meant another.
When an argument is started instead of allowing it to continue ask the other person to stop talking in a kind way. Then ask them to repeat what they thought you said to them. They may have misunderstood or thought you said something that was not your intention.
It may have not have been the words you said that upset them. It could be the inflection that you used behind the words. You may have sound harsh in your speaking instead of kind. Whatever the case is it is important to get things clarified before neither of you can take back the words that have been said.
Anyway this is my free advice and you can use it or not. We want to use words in a kind way to lift others up instead of putting them down. I am sure we all recall how unkind children are when speaking to their peers. We still remember words that were given to us as children and I am sure the words we used as well. I hope this is helpful.